82% of Brazilians Say Toddlers Shouldn't Have Phones — So Who Keeps Handing Them Over?

The news

Ahead of Children’s Day in Brazil (October 12), the research firm Instituto Locomotiva released a survey, reported by Brazil’s public news agency Agência Brasil on October 9, 2026. It interviewed 1,367 adults between September 28 and October 6. 82% of Brazilians oppose children up to age 3 being in front of smartphones; for kids aged 4 to 7, opposition is 75%. At the same time, 52% accept a child getting a phone of their own by age 12.

Two findings stood out to me most, and they come together: 83% of adults believe today’s children “don’t want to play outside anymore” and would rather “be on the phone or TV” — while 73% say playing outside is better for a child than screens. The report also notes that Brazil’s official guide on digital devices, published last year, recommends that children under 2 not be exposed to phone screens except for video calls with family.

What follows is my opinion, as a father and as someone who walks alongside couples in crisis.

Everyone agrees. Nothing changes.

Read those numbers again. Eight in ten adults are against small children on phones. Seven in ten think outside beats the screen. Almost nobody is defending a smartphone in a toddler’s hands.

So here is the question the survey leaves hanging: if almost everyone is against it, who keeps handing over the phone?

It wasn’t the two-year-old who went to the store, picked a model and started the cartoon. It was us. The adults. The parents. And I include myself — Vanessa and I have two kids, and I know exactly how tempting “just five minutes so I can breathe” can be.

That’s why the line “kids don’t want to play outside anymore” bothers me a little. It sounds like the problem is the child. As if a whole generation came from the factory without any desire to run, get dirty, or invent a game with a bottle cap. They didn’t. Children learn to want what we offer them. If the first thing a child receives when she cries is a screen, she will learn to ask for a screen whenever she’s sad. That’s not her flaw. It’s a habit we taught.

A phone is not a babysitter — and a father is not a guest

I understand the exhaustion. Parents who work all day come home drained, and there’s still dinner, baths, dishes and bills. A phone silences the living room in three seconds. But the question isn’t whether it works. The question is what it’s replacing.

In most homes I know, the phone in a child’s hand isn’t replacing a bad teacher. It’s replacing a dad sitting on the floor. A mom reading a story. Both parents playing something silly for twenty minutes.

Scripture places the shaping of children inside ordinary routine, not special events:

“These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” (Deuteronomy 6:6–7, NIV)

Sitting at home. Walking along the road. Lying down. Getting up. Notice those are exactly the moments screens tend to fill today — the couch, the car, the bed, breakfast. God isn’t against technology. He simply knows that hearts are formed in ordinary time, and ordinary time is the first thing we outsource.

The child’s phone starts with the parent’s phone

There’s a part of this conversation few parents like to hear: often the problem isn’t the child’s device. It’s ours.

A child watches Dad scrolling on the couch. Watches Mom answering texts in the middle of lunch. And learns, without anyone saying a word, that real life happens on that screen. Banning your kid’s phone won’t work if he can never get yours out of the way long enough to be seen.

Last week I commented on another Brazilian survey, about kids making secret purchases in apps and on social media, and the conclusion was similar: screens don’t raise children on their own, and example speaks louder than rules. If you want your child to put the phone down, the first screen that needs to go dark is yours.

This is a marriage issue, not just a parenting issue

I work with a lot of couples, and one pattern keeps showing up: Dad thinks Mom is “obsessive” about screens; Mom thinks Dad is “way too lax.” One forbids, the other secretly allows. The child — who is no fool — quickly learns to ask whoever says yes.

When husband and wife aren’t on the same page, screens become one more battlefield at home, with the kids caught in the middle. So before arguing about how many minutes the child gets, sit down together and decide as a team. No audience, no accusations. A few questions that help:

• From what age, and for what? A video call with Grandma is one thing; endless cartoons to stop the crying is another.
• Where do phones not go? The dinner table, bedrooms at bedtime, short car rides.
• What’s our own rule? If you agree on “no phones at dinner,” it applies to the adults too.
• What will we put in its place? Taking away the screen without offering presence just trades cartoon noise for crying.

The perfect rule matters less than speaking the same language. Children feel safe when they see Mom and Dad on the same side.

Streets full of children playing

There’s a verse I love that very few people know. When God describes, through the prophet Zechariah, what a restored Jerusalem would look like, one of the signs is this:

“The city streets will be filled with boys and girls playing there.” (Zechariah 8:5, NIV)

Children playing in the street appear in Scripture as a sign of peace, of a healed city, of blessing. It isn’t nostalgia from people who grew up without the internet. It’s a picture of what God calls the good life. And when the disciples tried to keep the children away, Jesus was blunt:

“Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19:14, NIV)

Sometimes what hinders a child from coming close isn’t bad theology. It’s a father who is never available.

An invitation for today

Today is Children’s Day in Brazil, and wherever you live, the invitation is the same. Beyond any gift, give your kids screen-free time. One hour. Even thirty minutes. Phones in another room — yours and theirs. The living-room floor, a ball in the backyard, play dough on the table, a story before bed.

Your child won’t remember every toy. But they will remember whether you sat on the floor with them.

There’s no perfect father and no screen-free home. There is an available father. And by the grace of God, any of us can start becoming one today.

If you want more conversations like this about marriage, family and faith with Christ at the center, follow Vanessa Lima and me — O Casal Legendário — on YouTube and Instagram.